How to meet a girl on VK. Theory and practice

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With the development of the Internet came the development of social networks, where anyone is already registered, both girls and boys. But we are men, so we will talk about how to meet a girl on VK, the preparatory stage and the process itself, and you will be the coolest pepper among your friends.

In fact, dating on the Internet is easier than on the street, due to the fact that the girl does not see your excitement, but here it is important to show yourself from a very good side, design the page correctly and write about yourself correctly. Let's talk about it.

Preparatory stage

Our task is to make a page on VKontakte so that immediately looking at it a girl will understand how valuable you are to her. Moreover, value, not necessarily in material equivalent, there can be many factors, your beauty, figure, maybe you have six-pack abs or you are a master at playing the drums or a manager with 500 subordinates. The most important thing for a girl is your social proof.

Gaining self-confidence in communicating with girls, and with people in general. How to change your life. Come in!

Social proof is how you are valued and respected by society. For example, there is a guy who is a student and he is just a guy, he studies, maybe works, he has the same money as a student. The usual one. And there is the same guy, but, for example, he is the head of the group and has little influence on other students. Which person is more valuable to a girl, first or second? The correct answer is the second one.

It turns out that the more we write about ourselves in a positive way to attract a girl, the better the success will be. But you can’t lie about it. If you write that you are a millionaire, have a yacht, and come to a meeting in tattered sneakers, then they will talk to you out of politeness for 10 minutes and, under various pretexts, will immediately leave you. And you can’t post photos of you next to a cool Lambo, a black BMW and a red Mercedes convertible if they are not yours. If you have a cool car, that’s a plus, but not a decisive one.

Rules for online communication. Guide for Dummies

Before you start communicating directly, you should determine the goals of the upcoming acquaintance. Are you bored and just want to chat virtually? Do you need a friend who shares your interests? Are you looking for a nice girl for rare romantic meetings with intimate continuation? Or do you dream of starting a family and are looking for one that will follow the same path with you for many years? Agree in each of these cases, communication will follow its own laws.

We recommend: What is Like and why is it needed?

However, there are some fundamental principles that apply to all online dating.

• Be positive! Girls love humor, but hate sarcasm. Therefore, kind jokes, emoticons and funny stories will encourage your interlocutor to communicate more closely. Forget dramatic stories and sarcastic statements for now.
• Write correctly. Not all modern girls are dolls with silicone lips. And this is not the kind of friend you dream of, right? If you are looking for a smart, well-read and interesting girl, follow the rules of the Russian language, carefully re-read your messages and correct all mistakes made.
• Be polite. Communication in the virtual world does not cancel the rules of polite tone. At the beginning of the dialogue you need to say hello, and at the end you need to say goodbye. The absence of swear words and familiarity is a huge plus for your karma!
• Keep it intriguing. Many pickup forums recommend constantly changing your communication tactics. For example, the “Closer - Farther” technique. It consists of first getting the girl as interested as possible, winning her over, and then disappearing from the network for a couple of days. This will keep your interlocutor in good shape and will force her to seek communication with you.
• Be different. Try on new looks and surprise your girlfriend. Show off your brutality, and then write a romantic poem for the beauty. Or in conversation, mention that you were into dancing. Believe me, the girl will be delighted!
• Ask questions. Psychologists say that a person is more interested in the interlocutor who is interested in him. Therefore, ask the girl about her interests and hobbies, let her talk about her family, work, and studies. Pets are also an excellent topic for confidential dialogue. Experiment and get as close as possible to your lady love.
• Send text messages. VKontakte conversations are just great! But your goal is to move communication into the real world as soon as possible. The ideal transition option is SMS messages that allow you to stay in touch all day long.

How to properly create your VK page

Photos

The most important factors on your page are photographs and the better the photographs are taken, the easier success will be. The photographs should be varied, in which you are captured as confident or positive. To do this, ask a friend to take a photo of you with a good DSLR or at least a good phone. The more diverse photos, the better. It's even better if you hire a good photographer.

Read more: Long distance relationships

Urgently remove all photos from drinking parties, inadequate annealing, looking at which, a negative impression will be formed about you. Also remove the photographs, in a drunken stupor with a cigarette in his mouth and in an embrace with Vasya Gopnik. The majority of girls like neat guys, constantly developing and with their heads on their shoulders, and not those who, in an altered state of consciousness, bully other gopniks.

Number of friends

We will assume that you have dealt with the photographs and can proceed to the next stage. An important criterion, but not critical, is your number of friends. As I wrote above, girls like guys who are successful in society, and your success at this stage can be confirmed by the number of friends. Get at least 150-200 friends to start. Once again, this will be a plus, but not the most important thing.

There are people who have only 50-60 friends and are very successful with girls, but they do not need to confirm this, all success is within themselves, and not in external factors. Girls feel this well.

Your wall

Delete all reposts associated with free sweepstakes, this gives the impression that you cannot afford what you are reposting, or at least pin some kind of post that will hide reposts with quizzes.

What's best to leave on the wall? Everything related to the positive, it will be even better if girls throw something interesting on your wall. This way, an unfamiliar girl will see that you are popular among other people, which means you are valuable.

It will look cool if they post various congratulations on your wall, such as with others or with ng. and other holidays, do not delete them. It is best to completely get rid of all kinds of politics and religion.

Guide to Changing Yourself.pdf

To sum it up

Since the girl doesn’t see you in person, your photos and page design should do this in your place. The main rule is no need to lie. You can embellish it, but there is no point in lying, they will quickly find out and cheat you.

If you have a good friend, show her your page, listen to all her comments and correct it, if possible, it won’t take much time.

A story about yourself

Let's figure out further how to start a correspondence with a girl. So, if an acquaintance has already been established, you need to know how to keep the conversation going. To do this, you need to tell about yourself and find out all the most interesting and important things about the life of the lady you like. In this case, you need to review your completed application form. In some cases, it can be edited a little, adjusting the information towards the interests of the lady you like. What should you tell about yourself? Correspondence with a girl will be very successful if there are no boring stories like “born-raised-studied-work.” First of all, we need to talk about those aspects of life where you can find similar interests:

1. Hobbies, interests.
2. Favorite films, music.
3. Recreation preferences (visiting clubs, going out into nature, hanging out with friends at home or in a quiet place, etc.).

However, it is also important to talk about your place of study or work. After all, there may be certain lines of intersection. At the same time, it is necessary not only to tell. After your speech, you need to ask an appropriate question, for example: “I love cars and everything connected with them. How do you feel about this hobby?” If a lady is not interested in something, you should not stop there, you need to move on to the next object of attention.

Examples of correspondence

There will be no examples of correspondence here, and I will now tell you why. We are all different people and everyone’s internal state is different from each other. And, for example, someone in a very good mood wrote complete crap to a girl. The girl felt the guy’s good mood and responded. Word for word they agreed to meet and had a wonderful time.

Read more: How to get rid of guilt

Now let’s take the same example of dialogue and give it to a completely insecure guy, and he will have absolutely no success, because your inner state plays an important role. First of all, I recommend leveling it up, and trust me, the dialogues will pop out of your head over time.

Just try to be sincere and honest, you can always tell the girl directly, like you’re beautiful and I really liked you, I want to invite you to meet, maybe something cool will come out of this for the two of us.

If you're worried, use the technique in the video.

Video on the topic of dating in VK

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Groups

Interesting girls can be found in women's groups. Communities can be divided into two types:

• by interests: hobbies, goods, etc.;
• psychological, with or without the prefix “pseudo”: there are many different beautiful quotes and useful tips.

Naturally, you should not waste time on groups of mothers. Most of the participants are already occupied there.

Communities with quotes are the most promising. You just need to select those posts that talk about loneliness or failed relationships, and see who liked and reposted.

You don’t have to play spy, but go straight to dating groups, where you can find available girls for dating very quickly and for free, without registration. The main problem is that it is advisable to choose those who live in the same locality as you.

But she decides:

1. You can join communities that bring together people from the same city. An example of such groups: “Dating Samara”, “Looking for you. Vladivostok”, etc. In large cities, communities are created to find a soul mate, even by region.
2. If you have entered the federal community, you can use the search here. Click on the list of participants, then click on the search icon and set the necessary parameters, down to the first and last name. Although the latter may be needed only to find a specific, already familiar girl in the group.

In dating communities you can leave information about yourself. Probably some lady will dare and offer friendship first. But you shouldn’t count on this too much. It is advisable to do everything yourself, to be active.

Practice

Let's return to the previous question, about the fact that you need to meet a certain girl or do you want to meet a lot of different ones?

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Dating a certain girl

Do you understand that you only have one chance to show your best side? Just one chance. Okay, maybe 2 chances. In order for the shot to hit the target, you need good experience in communicating with girls. It’s better to wait another month and start practicing communication with other girls. Gain confidence and hit a lot of bumps before you take your shot.

But there is a side effect: you can change your attraction from one girl to another and forget the one for whom you started doing all this in the first place. It happens.

Dating many, different girls.

This is where the fun begins, and you need to approach it wisely. The more you write to different girls you like, the more dialogue experience you get. Try to start each dialogue by coming up with different, original phrases. And don’t even think about being shy or afraid that they won’t like your phrase. Until you write it, you won't know about it.

By the way, you can start training with girls from distant other cities, whom you are unlikely to see in your life. And don’t be shy at the end to ask if you liked the first phrase and what could be improved and corrected. Well, you always try to act differently. The more creative the approach, the faster the development. Well, a positive attitude is the main thing.

About men

If you start a correspondence with a girl, you also need to clarify how the lady treats members of the opposite sex and whether she is thinking of starting close communication with guys in the near future. The answer is important, because the future of the correspondence itself will depend on it. If a girl is hostile towards people of the opposite sex, then you should not waste your time on her. Let's consider what correspondence with girls can be like in this case. Examples of possible questions from your side are given below.

1. What character traits do you want to see in a young man? What, in your opinion, do not make a man beautiful?
2. Are you ready to visit some interesting place in the near future (hint of a date)?
3. How ready are you to change your life in the near future (hint of a serious relationship)?
4. What kind of ideal couple is she?

It is important to remember here that if a lady goes away from the topic, you also need to step back from it for a while. Otherwise, it’s easy to scare off a girl with your pressure.

How to invite girls to a meeting.

Let’s say you’ve gained experience and already feel comfortable in correspondence. Your goal should always be to meet a girl. Constant correspondence without a decision to meet will not lead to anything good. If you are afraid to meet yourself, then just be brave. Live communication, because this is also an experience that needs to be gained and developed.

Perhaps the first 3-5 dates will go poorly and you will not show yourself to be the most confident and courageous guy, but suddenly, after the 6th date, your experience will already be enough to have sex with a girl at the first meeting in the toilet in a cafe. Yes, this also happens and you should be prepared for it. Condoms, determination and you're all set.

Topics that will appeal to many young ladies

In order for correspondence with a girl to be very successful, you definitely need to interest the lady. In this case, you need to choose an appropriate topic for conversation. So, let’s look at the questions a girl should definitely ask when texting:

1. Questions about her personality. All people love to talk about themselves and their achievements. Therefore, after almost every story, it is good to ask a question, as they say, on the topic. This way you can chat for hours, learning more and more information about each other.
2. Preferences. You definitely need to ask the girl about her preferences in all possible areas of life. You can talk not only about music, movies or books. So, you can find out about your favorite clothing style, weather, season, food, drinks, etc.
3. Future plans. This path is very risky (especially if the guy is afraid of commitment), but sometimes you can ask about the girl’s plans for the future. If the answers she gave are ambiguous and are not to your liking, you need to quickly move the topic in a different direction. However, you should not choose a completely opposite topic, so that the girl does not get the feeling that the guy is deliberately ignoring this or that question. For example, if a lady wrote: “I dream of getting married and having five children,” you can answer: “That’s good. “I have a sister (brother) - they have a family, there are children, they are so happy.” And then move on to the topic of relatives.

conclusions

It's easy to meet girls, easy to communicate with them. If you think about the fact that you don’t know what to say to a girl, you will continue to stammer and remain silent. You can communicate with a girl on any topic, the main thing is that they are positive: Cinema, color, cats, stories from childhood, the best vacation of your life, and so on.

But never talk about politics, religion, all sorts of maniacal things - in these topics everyone should remain of their own opinion. There are other positive conversations that will be more beneficial in getting closer.

If you don’t succeed at all and at the thought of writing to a girl, your ass becomes the size of a pin’s eye, then write to me, we’ll work through this moment and replace the program of self-doubt with calm, relaxation and perseverance.

That’s all, I’m sure this article is useful for beginners who are confused and want to find a magic pill in the form of a better dialogue with a girl, but there is no such thing. It will be more accurate, but only when you come up with it yourself. I hope that now there will be no questions about how to meet a girl on VK.

The best phrases for meeting a girl on the Internet - instructions for use

Much in successful correspondence depends on the quality of the first message. Because if you don’t get an answer to it, then all the knowledge about effective communication on the Internet will not be useful.

The right goals that you should achieve thanks to the first message.

• The basic goal is to get a response from the girl (obviously, but many guys don't get a response to the first message);
• Stand out from other guys who write to a girl;
• Get a phone number;
• Make sure that the girl herself takes the initiative in communicating with you (The most correct goal);

Now let’s figure out point by point what phrases you need to write to achieve these goals.

1. The basic goal is to get an answer.

To get a girl to respond to your message, you need to use intrigue. Your message should raise questions in her head, and she should want answers to them.

3 options for phrases that a girl will answer with a probability close to 100%:

• Hello, I liked one thing about you
• There is one feature in you that repels men, but on the contrary I like it
• There is one thing about you, I saw it

You create intrigue and the girl is very interested in getting your answer. Therefore, she will enter into communication with you.

Above you see how I used one of the phrases while meeting a girl on Badoo

Vadim Kalantarov Blog author

More about me

IMPORTANT!

If you are having difficulties in a relationship and need help, write me “+” in VKontakte messages. I will assess your situation and suggest a possible solution to the problem.

Write to Vadim

Vadim Kalantarov Blog author

More about me

IMPORTANT!

If you are having difficulties in a relationship and need help, write me “+” in VKontakte messages. I will assess your situation and suggest a possible solution to the problem.

Write to Vadim

2. Stand out from the rest

Girls on dating sites receive the same, template messages that they are pretty tired of. Therefore, your task is to write what no one writes to her.

Phrases that most people write:

• Hello. Shall we meet? (Here you also ask permission - this is terrible)
• Hello. I liked you
• Hello. Tell us about yourself/How are you/What are you doing? You should forget about these phrases

Once you have written an effective message with intrigue, the next step is to write the second message correctly.

An example of what not to do: You: I liked one feature about you She: What? You: You have beautiful eyes

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Why shouldn't this be done? Because the girl received a message a million times about how beautiful her eyes are. You don't stand out.

And now the correct example: You: I liked one feature about you She: What? You: You have intelligent eyes

Usually, after such a message, girls told me that it was the first time they heard such a compliment.

Advice! It’s better to write a crazy and unusual message instead of an “adequate” and boring one

Above you see another screenshot of my first message on Badu. This message is not exemplary, but it is many times better than a banal template.

3. Get a phone number

In general, I consider this the main goal in correspondence. It’s much easier to call a girl and ask her out on a date over the phone. If inviting you on a date over the phone causes difficulties, then all the more you need to practice.

And now I’ll tell you the phrase that I use myself to get a girl’s phone number.

Here is this phrase: You look great!!)) Write your phone number!!))

It's that simple. I collected hundreds of phone numbers using this phrase. Some girls immediately texted their phone number, some didn’t want to text and had to push through (there will be screenshots below), and some left the message unanswered. But if you have set up your profile correctly, then you will have a large flow of girls and you will collect numbers without any problems.

But it’s not always possible to get a number right away; sometimes persistence and flexibility are required.

Persistence always helps

There is no point in complicating the process and coming up with unrealistically entertaining correspondence when you can get a number in one message, call, and go on a date the very next day.

Clue! If a girl doesn’t give you her phone number and ignores you, then just write to her: “Are you alive?” And when she answers, invite her to switch to another social network. network and start communicating there (forget about the phone for a while)

Because many girls are afraid to give their numbers to strangers. And one more thing - if you have few girls with whom you correspond on a dating site, then it is better not to start with the phrase: “Give me your phone number.” Because This technique is effective when there are a lot of girls and there is a mailing.

The girl initially ignored the message

And another no less important point. If you write to a girl on VK (and not on a dating site), then you cannot write the first message asking for a number. VKontakte has slightly different dating rules.

4. Make the girl take the initiative herself

This is the coolest level, when you don’t have to do anything, and the girls themselves start writing to you and coming up with topics for conversation with you. And all you have to do is choose the best. But there is one point - in order not to waste all these girls, you must know the rules of correspondence (more on this soon)

How can you get girls to write to you?

You will need:

• Dating site (Badoo, Tinder, etc.)
• High-quality photos and well-designed profile
• A large number of mutual likes (with a good profile they will be)
• Secret message

I experimented for a long time and decided to settle on this option: “Hi. Let's move to VK, I'm rarely here (link). Write to me, I’ll be glad to see you)"

And I send a newsletter to all the girls on badoo with whom I have the same likes. After this, messages from them begin to arrive in the contact’s personal account. But I repeat, it is important that you have a sufficient number of mutual likes, otherwise you will not feel the result (since not all girls will write to you)

We send out a newsletter, and then all that remains is to wait and start receiving messages from girls

Girls text first

The advantages of this scheme:

• The girl writes to you first (invests in you);
• This is non-standard, because usually the initiative comes from the guys;
• In most cases, girls themselves start asking questions and you don’t have to come up with anything yourself;
• Your value in her eyes will be higher, unlike other guys from the site;

Vdovin Ivan

• More than 15 years in psychology
• Owner of 2 successful businesses
• Developed his own method “Key Therapy”
• Certified NLP Practitioner
• Certified Hypnotherapist
• In practice I use: Gestalt therapy, imagery therapy, body therapy, art therapy, hypnosis, Hellinger constellations
• Helped over 100 clients
• I invested more than 500,000 rubles in my education
• My blog is visited by more than 1500 people per day

Reviews

VKontakte audiencei

Before looking for friends and life partners in this place, you need to find out what kind of people live on this site. According to statistics, there is almost zero activity on this social network among people over 45 years old. The largest number of users are young people under 24 years of age.

The survey showed that people from this category use this social network in 92% of cases. Most of these users are on the site to communicate and consume a variety of entertainment content. That is, people in this place feel light and relaxed. And, what is important, they are ready to communicate with new people.

VKontakte has a huge number of diverse communities of interests. Here you can find both small amateur groups “for your own” and large “publics” of an entertainment nature, news magazines and representative offices of large brands and various projects.

On this social network you can meet absolutely anyone – the variety of tastes among users is simply amazing. You will be able to find both fans of Japanese animation and supporters of political parties. For communication and dating, VKontakte is an ideal platform.